The Yellow Scar

I believe that certain people are put in your life for a purpose. There is a certain man in my life who is of great importance to me. It was once said that "If you are cut deep enough several times, you are left with a scar--an everlasting reminder of every single wound." Over and over. Beaten with that verbal whip. Preceding each lash on your psyche with a cringe of pain before the whip has even been raised in preparation to crack.

I know I am not alone in my pain; those around me have to endure the "task master." Try as I might, to hold in my sorrow, I lash out in defense--helpless and alone. I hide in my closet; that is the only place to go. It's dark and I am safe...for now... The next attack could be soon or afar off, but no matter, everything belongs to him. He can come and go as he pleases; he can say what he wishes without a single regret or force to stop the words flowing from his slithering tongue.

I want to feel close to him despite all of the hate I feel towards him. I want to feel free express myself in front of him without worry of criticism or sarcastic remarks. I want to feel secure in his love for me.

The Magic Flute

Wikipedia tells us that “The Magic Flute (German Die Zauberflöte, K. 620) is an opera in two acts composed in 1791 by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart to a libretto by Emanuel Schikaneder. The work is in the form of a Singspiel, a popular form that included both singing and spoken dialogue.” Also, Wikipedia summarizes The Magic Flute quite simply when it says “Sarastro, the wise priest of Isis and Osiris, has taken Pamina to the temple for the purpose of releasing her from the influence of her mother, the Queen of the Night. The queen induces the young Prince Tamino to go in search of her daughter and free her from the power of Sarastro; Tamino accomplishes his end, but becomes the disciple of Sarastro, whose mildness and wisdom he has learned to admire. The prince and the princess are united."

My expectations were proven true as soon as I was seated. This is was going to be an excellent performance. My friend, Maggie, was in it and that alone was one of the main reasons for me to attend, however, I knew that there were many musicians in the pit orchestra I knew that played well, and of course the lovely gowns and wigs they would wear—it was all so exciting! The stage was just waiting for those prepared and anxious singers to fill in order that the show could begin. Many people around me looked anxious also; there was a lot of murmuring and sort of an excitement in the air. And as the lights dimmed and the curtain opened, I knew that I was in for a real treat—not only was the singing lovely, but the entire seemed to light up with the combination of an attentive audience and a communicative group of musicians.

Propaganda Analysis

It’s spring. A mother shows her child how she cares for her world. Her brunette hair, pale complexion, and clean, cut outfit are symbols of the typical American woman. This woman has a stately air about her stance; she seems completely comfortable and stable—physically and emotionally. The clothes that hang on her slender and curvy body are simple. The focus of her body is on her countenance and the action she is engaged in. She gently pours water from a garden pitcher on a lawn where flowers are blooming. Her son watches intently; he sits cross-legged on the ground with a clumsy smile wiped across his face. His caring mother is showing him that she cares for the Earth and she desires for him to learn the same. CVS/Pharmacy emphasizes that they care as much as you do about the Earth and it’s dwellers through their advertisement. This mother is intended to represent a pharmacist at CVS/Pharmacy whose love and care for the Earth is reflected in her work ethic. Through an appealing display, CVS/Pharmacy
Commercials take use of visual, emotional, and verbal cues. Word choice can affect the way in which a person perceives you, the product you are selling, and/or the company you are promoting. One technique that can affect the amount information you, as the consumer, retain is repetition. A company repeats their slogan or motto many times. CVS/Pharmacy’s slogan, for example, is “For all the ways you care.”

is repeated verbally in the commercial and is most likely visually displayed, as well. Another persuasive technique is words that are too general—nice, nature, care—that are much too relative to the background of the reader/listener/viewer. During a 2007 CVS/Pharmacy commercial, CVS uses a famous artist (Sarah McLachlan) to perform a song (Ordinary Miracle) that sends the message that they want throughout, and in closing, they leave you with a question. “It’s in your nature to care for others, to listen, to advise, to always be there. Isn’t it nice that there’s a pharmacy that cares as much as you do?” The couple minute monologue is to persuade viewers that CVS/Pharmacy is positive and encouraging, yet they expect you to view their pharmacists as loving and caring. Throughout the entirety of the commercial, “Ordinary Miracle” is heard; its lyrics are specifically designed to challenge you to act upon the message. “Life is like a gift they say, wrapped up for you everyday; open up and find a way, to give some of your own. Isn’t it remarkable? Like every time a raindrop falls. It’s just another ordinary miracle today.“ CVS/Pharmacy desires that all their potential costumers have the mindset that their pharmacy will be something that is ordinary and accessible, but the care and treatment you will receive is unordinary and rare.
It’s summer. A quiet evening with a full moon shining brightly in the cloudless sky allows for a romantic night. The couple sits silently gazing on the thousands of stars and the glowing moon; comparatively, they are so entranced with the sky and each other, that their surroundings are viewed as miniscule. Their white house has a lovely porch swing on which they are both comfortably resting. The man’s arm is placed lovingly on the woman’s shoulder. CVS/Pharmacy facilitates the appearance of the compassionate

and respectable couple through the decent apparel they are wearing and their sweet, innocent quality time. And the artist strategically placed a few flowers toward the front of the picture. The flowers are not only a reoccurring theme in the summer visual advertisement, but they represent peace and beauty; this implies labor on the yard and therefore a beautiful outcome.
An animated commercial like CVS/Pharmacy’s makes use of the propaganda tools in their box. Words like “ordinary” imply that the company desires to be in your community and promotes the philosophy that the employees and location should be local. Plain Folks is the propaganda reference I would place on this “community” emphasis. Throughout each sketch, the company has been careful to represent their idea of a “typical” American. Phrases such as “in your nature to care for others, listen to others and to advise,” allow for viewers to believe that CVS/Pharmacy hires only the most caring and thoughtful pharmacists—an example of glittering generality.
It’s fall. Two girlfriends are taking a brisk walk, breathing in the crisp autumn air. Appropriate clothing and plain colors allow for the viewer to admire their clothing, but concentrate primarily on the expressions on their faces. The one on the left is endearingly placing her hand on the friend that so eagerly seeks her guidance and/support. The women have mocha skin and brown wavy hair. And as the sun shines brightly behind them, they look hopeful for the future. These friends know that they will be there for each other throughout every season of the year and of life. CVS/Pharmacy claims to care for you the same way that you care for others, but can they live up to their standards?

Interview with Jacque De Fouw 5

9. What do you feel is the most important lesson that you teach you medical students? What do you want to them to accomplish as a result of this knowledge?

One of my favorite quotes and I don’t know who said it, but “nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.” I think that is very important. I think it’s something that the hospitals need to remember.

10. How do you think the education you received and taught would be affected if the United States had a globally run health care system?

The hospitals would be a lot different. I think that the hospitals and private clinics might have an easier road because they wouldn’t have to deal with so many insurance companies. They would have one entity. Perhaps, just like TennCare here in Tennessee, they would sell it through different companies. There are for profit companies that sell government health care plans. I think this clinic would probably be run the same as it is now; however, the funding might be different in that they might allocate money to college health care centers. All of the money that we receive is through student fees, that’s why we treat students and not faculty and staff. We do treat faculty, however, they have to pay.

Interview with Jacque De Fouw 4

7. How would you compare your experiences of studying and teaching health care at different universities on a national level? Do you feel that the government needs to find a new health care system for its university students?

It is hard for me to compare because I worked at a community college campus in Michigan and we didn’t have a health care center. I have worked in hospitals in Michigan.

8. What would you say are the pros and cons to having a privately run health care system in the United States?

I think we have been having a crisis for probably the last twenty years; prior to that, there weren’t as many people, it seemed better then—we didn’t have as much litigation or fear of litigation, people were very trusting with hospitals and I’m sure that probably led to the litigations and things. But I think that HMO’s are run on the same type of thing that we do here, that you pay ahead and then you can go in and be seen for whatever you need to be seen. We have two major parts in our health center here and one is to educate, to teach people ways to stay well, which is my job, and then if they get sick or hurt, to take care of them and get them back into wellness. And of course, our big theme is “Wellness must be pre-requisite to all else. Students cannot be intellectually proficient if they’re physically and psychologically unwell.” That was written by Earnest Boyer. I know a lot of health educators use this statement, but the bottom line is if you’re sick, you can’t do well in school, and we want to keep you well—mentally, physically, socially, in all realms. So that is a big calling. To use a cliché, “you lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” And we do as much education as I can handle. Myself, I have two graduate assistants and we try to do the education. Now with an HMO, they will triage a person when they come in; they will decide if that person needs education, if they need maintenance or if it’s an acute episode and they need intensive care. So, they kind triage them into those ways and decide what they need. And a lot of the people that come in here, only need to learn how to do something or how to take care of themselves; they may be fine, but they might need to change their diet or something like that. We kind of do the same kind of thing. So, if someone has a bad illness, we send him or her off to a hospital or that type of facility. I think that we are much like the HMO’s.

I like being able to choose my own provider. I like to be able to go to the provider that I have chosen and not one that is chosen for me. I think it’s important to be able to make informed decisions.

I lived in a city right on the Canadian border and “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.” And it sounds great; countries like Great Britain and Canada have the social medicine system where you are entitled to medical care. It sounds wonderful, but in actuality, our hospitals in the states are filled with Canadians. Two-thirds of the nurses in the hospital in which I worked were Canadian nurses. I taught in a nursing school, and they would hire the Canadian nurses over our students, because they maybe had more experience and they tended to work for a lower wage. These Canadian nurses would take the ferry across or come across the bridge to work in our hospitals and the patients would come to us because they couldn’t get the care they needed when the needed it. We had patients come for orthopedic surgery that had broken their leg and they needed surgery on it, but they were scheduled for six months down the road, or they had breast cancer and they couldn’t have their breasts removed right away and they had to wait for three months. Well, you don’t wait with those things. There was a terrible back log and plus they are under staffed like we are in the hospitals and the nurses tend to be coming to the states to get paid more. It was not a panacea that we see it as. When I break my leg, I want to take care if it right away; I don’t want to have to live with it for at least six months and have it re-broken and set. If I had gallbladder disease and needed to have my gallbladder removed, I need to do it now, not in two months when they have an opening. That has been a problem. It sounds great for everybody to be covered.

Interview with Jacque De Fouw 3

4. Dr. Edmund Pellegrino, author, physician, and educator, argued that it is “ethics, not economics, [that] should drive the nation’s health system.” Do you believe that the United States government is more focused on the economics of health care, rather than the ethical aspect? Why?

Well, the health care industry is the largest economic thing in The United States. If the health care industry would fail, we would probably go into a really deep depression or something. It seems that economics rule over ethics at the present time. I would have to say in larger areas, such as the university health care center here, we are very in tune to ethics and what is going on. We are concerned that people get the most care for the smallest amount of money; we’re very fortunate that we can do that. And we do not deal with insurance companies. We don’t take any insurance here, so it’s not something we have to deal with. The politics of it all is very discouraging, and I’m glad I’m not in that system anymore. It’s so discouraging when you have a new mother that really needs to how to take care of a new baby and yet her insurance will only let you pay for that twenty-four hours in the hospital. Or you have someone that have complications from their surgery or they may not have a competent care-giver at home. I mean there are just a hundred different things. And you know that they need care in the hospital for a longer period of time, but they’re prohibited from staying because their insurance will not pay for it, and the hospitals don’t like to have to cover the costs of people staying longer.

5. Does the average University of Memphis student have health insurance? Do you believe that providing University health insurance is the answer for more effective on campus health care? Why?

We do keep statistics on students that do come in here, so that we know how many do have outside health insurance. If a student comes in and needs something further than we can do or they need to see a specialist, we tried to refer them to someone that will be able to handle whatever insurance that they do or don’t have.

6. How would you compare the health center at other universities you have worked versus Memphis’? Would you say that overall, students at The University of Memphis need a better health care system?

I think that having the health care on campus certainly provides access for care for students and I think they wouldn’t seek care as often if they didn’t have some place here to go. And the fact that it is pre-paid through their student access fee, it is very convenient for them to be able to come in and be seen by a doctor or a nurse practitioner and not have a cost involved. We also have the lab and x-ray that frequently there are no charges for, because it’s things that we can do here on campus, whereas, if we do have to send them out, we have to charge. Then we let the student know how much it would cost them. But the fact that we don’t take any insurance is good for students, whether insured or not. I hope that because we have this facility that students don’t think they shouldn’t get insurance, because there are a lot of things that we cannot cover here; I mean if a student were to get hit by a car or have a disease or develop diabetes, we can help them in the crisis, but we can’t manage that occurrence since we don’t have hospitalization or anything like that. Students really should carry their own health insurance, so that if something unplanned happens, they would have some sort of bridge.

Interview with Jacque De Fouw 2

2. One organization that is working to transform and regenerate the health care system of the mid-south is the Memphis Quality Initiative (MQI). Their goal is to be [a] catalyst, a resource, and a capacity-builder for health care quality improvement in the Mid-South. By working together, member hospitals strive to provide the right care to every patient, every time. [This includes]: pursuing perfection by providing care that is safe, timely, effective, efficient, equitable, and patient-centered, encouraging patient-centered customized care while discouraging unwarranted variation, improving care by sharing quality initiatives among medical and administrative professionals. Would you say that these goals are being met?

I’m not really involved in much of what the city is doing. I know of health initiatives that they have, but I’m not sure if they are through the program which you’re speaking. I know that one of the big initiatives is to eradicate syphilis from the city. They have a coalition that goes around and does free HIV and syphilis testing in different areas. They offer this free testing at different times, especially on awareness days. They used to come to the college campus and provide it for us for free every other month. I know that the city is active in doing things. I’m more concerned with health college campuses.

Interview with Jacque De Fouw 1

Jacque De Fouw joined the university as Health Educator in September 2000 after twenty-six years of nursing and nurse educator experience in Michigan.

1. How much would you say that the United States government filter what you are taught as a medical student? What kind of information do they provide? What role, if any, does The United States’ Effective Health Care Program (EHCP), whose mission is to be “dedicated to fulfilling this need (finding reliable and practical data that can inform people in order that they may make the best health decisions) through high-quality research and getting that information to you, someone who needs to make health care decisions” play in your education or in the education you provide your students?

The government does have guidelines for what you do and what you can’t do. They are allowed to sensor things. So, pretty much what I was taught in nursing school was medical science; I don’t think it was propaganda for the government. Although, some people think that some of the cigarette stuff and tobacco. It was pretty well founded in science so that it was the basis for what we were taught.

I think you’re referring to the FDA. I know that there have been a lot of criticisms of the FDA in recent years. I do know that they have so many duties relegated to them by different administrations and not enough staff. They are terribly understaffed to be able to do things. I know that there is a problem with things not being scientifically driven, instead being more industry driven; and they are trying to get away from that. It has been a big problem with the FDA. The industry wants to pay for things to be done. And in the very recent years, we have seen a lot of medications that we have tested and seem to be safe, but when they’re put on the market those that who don’t see the benefit of the medicine to those that are in need complain that it was put out too soon. It may also have a side effect that doesn’t seem so great. I know that the FDA is trying to get around that, however, the FDA is politically driven—the people are appointed to their positions. My cousin was the head of the FDA for a while, and he had been appointed, but when Bush came into power he was sent to another position and someone else took his place. I know that my cousin had worked very hard on preventing mad-cow disease from coming to the United States. He tried to get away from the industry driven side of things and getting back to the scientifically based agency. Now that they have added tobacco to their list of things to do and regulate, it’s just a big problem with not having enough money and not enough staff.

English 1010 Evaluation

Haha…this is what I wrote last semester for my evaluation. Wow, my writing has changed…

Although English is my primary language, I am continually amazed by the various aspects of my English, such as grammar, tone, or word choice, that need growth. During these last fifteen weeks, I have become more aware of my writing and comprehension strengths and weaknesses; strengths, which include that my ideas are relevant and on topic and weaknesses which are supporting my thoughts with concrete statements and writing errors, such as commas, quotation marks, etc. With this new knowledge and understanding of my currents writing level, I have been able to see more clearly how I have grown and the ways in which I can improve.

In conclusion, I feel that through focusing on my writing and comprehension weaknesses, I have developed a clearer picture of what I am capable of. This is exciting as I can always use motivation to write. Throughout the semester I have been pushed to study new and different ideas, learn different terms that were connected with them, discuss them with my fellow classmates, and organize these new ones while creating my own in order to write an assortment of essays. And after fighting through this jungle of a variety learning techniques and weeding out some bad habits, I am confident that I am prepared for what battles lie ahead of me next semester in English 1020.

ADDICTION: Movies

My love for movies has certainly been obvious this year as I viewed close to forty during this school year alone. The very idea that you can escape to another person’s life or simply a different reality is appealing—I experience a “high” that lasts for at least thirty minutes following a film. Somehow, my mind builds a connection to the characters, scenery, and music.

The life of movies is the passion—heart and soul—of each of the actors, directors, and producers. Different perspectives allow for different views and philosophies to be integrated into the story, dialogue, characters, and atmosphere of the film. Throughout each scene, my understanding of the mind of the writers and directors becomes clearer. The meaning or moral of the story within these films have a great emotional affect upon me, because I create an emotional attachment with the characters—I feel as if I have gone on their life journey with them.

Does Pigment Make The Black Man Incapable?

What is your first thought when you hear or see the name “Bill Cosby?” Do you think of infamy or fame? Do you think of loving father or a sexual harasser? Do you think of hero or man with amnesia? Ta-Nehisi Coates addresses most specifically the “audacity of Bill Cosby’s black conservatism” in his article entitled “’This is how we lost to the white man.’” Throughout Coates’ piece, he gave somewhat of a history and created a sort of “backdrop” to place Cosby’s most recent activity in front of and in comparison to. However, I feel that Coates’ attack toward the end of his article was based on opinion rather than fact. Not only did I feel that Cosby was underrepresented, but I also felt that Coates’ logic was just as ridiculous as he said Cosby’s was.

Dear Diary

Have you ever missed someone so much that you can hardly breathe, sleep or eat? Every waking moment you spend consists of wasteful sighs and dreams of an existence—a day—where you fall asleep to hopeful dreams of tomorrow and you wake to a blissful morning. Faint sounds of chirping, smells of fresh coffee, and the sensation of that special someone lying next to you listening anxiously for your next breath, absorb your senses. Each time you pass a couple your thoughts are automatically consumed in that person that is etched on your beating, red, sick pump that sends life to your aching soul.

What am I to do? One girl. One life. One chance. Clinging to what the future holds forces me to an state of unawareness; helpless and sick, I feel the reality I desire will never come. I long for each refreshing breath with every fiber in my bones; from the exact moment my eyes meet his, I loose control. My knees weaken and buckle, my stomach turns and leaps, and in one sweeping motion I no longer standing on the ground.

For now, I am made to wait and grasp to the intangible dream, thought, and feeling that endlessly ensnares my thoughts to its captive audience. Am I so weak as to allow my emotions to take control? Yes! Ha…indeed, I am.

“Handling The Pan” in Memphis

Making my way to yet another brown brick building, I glide up the stairs, through the double doors, up two more flights of stairs and head down the hall, going north. Patterson only has one amiable quality in my eyes—the building is always just the right temperature. Entering the large classroom, I notice a man that I fail to recognize. I assume that this is just the man I had come to see speak--Dr. Pete Gathje. With a name like Gathje, I’m already impressed. But soon, some other students trickle in and Dr. Gathje’s time had come. First, Wendy, the English 1020 professor who makes us earn our sanity, introduced her former professor. During the brief preface to the informative speech, Wendy spoke of Dr. Gathje’s involvement—both founder and director—with Emanuel House Manna, a non-profit organization that “promotes hospitality for homeless persons, provides support for Prisoners and their families, promotes educational work in schools and the community, and promotes efforts to abolish the death penalty.” In conjunction with his work at Manna House, Wendy mentioned Dr. Gathje’s position of Associate Professor of Christian Ethics at Memphis Theological Seminary.

Although the amiable man had caught my attention through various statistics, he did not strike me as the sort of fellow that could convince me to pull national defense finances for the homeless. There is something so flawed and yet so true about his logic. Therefore, I must give this homeless issue more thought. Until then, I will ponder the never-ending question, “How can we (The City of Memphis) help the poor and homeless with our time and finances?”

Left Behind…Again…

One summer afternoon, I received a panicked phone call from my Mom that Ryan was extremely depressed. “I’ve never seen him like this before,” she whimpered. Scared that her only son had been wounded, she pleaded with me, “PLEASE! Send him a card or a letter; give him a phone call and talk with him for a while. SOMETHING! He misses you so much!” After such a traumatic conversation, I felt compelled as a sister and friend to leap at the first opportunity I had to write him a letter. Throughout the two-page letter, I addressed the depression that he was struggling with by reassuring him that the Lord was with him; “God will comfort and guide you.” Praise the Lord that with each passing summer Ryan acquired a higher tolerance for my absence; and with a growing tolerance, came a growing knowledge of coping mechanisms. Unfortunately, I missed him, but comprehending what he was feeling was difficult as I’m the eldest child. The saddest part was that I didn’t seem to miss him as much or in the same way as he missed me; I guess I just don’t realize how difficult is has been for him to adjust.

Improv Everywhere

Improv Everywhere is a group of comedians that love to play pranks on the streets of New York City. Their pranks do not harm New Yorkers, but rather promote laughter in the serious and busy city. They’ve pulled over twenty different pranks—musicals in a food court, two-hundred seven people freezing simultaneously in Grand Central Station, twenty-three people give a random guy one hundred hugs, etc. With each harmless joke, they first form a plan and have a meeting on how they will act out their devious plan. Once in action, they blend into the masses, suddenly pull their prank, and disappear just as quickly as they appeared.

I feel that our society could use more of these harmless pranks in order to lighten up the dark, serious sky that we use to cover ourselves. This life is too short to spend worrying and stressing over details to the point that we can’t enjoy the time we are given. This group reminds me that I should relax and soak in the laughs that this life has to offer. The animals, the heavens, the earth, the waters, and the people, that God has so richly blessed with should not be taken for granted. I hope to enjoy many more laughs.

Why Do I Play The Violin?

The week before Spring Break, my violin professor, Soh Hyun, gave her students the assignment of physically writing out the reason they study and perform the violin. My thoughts went wild as I recalled different learning experiences I have had, the countless hours spent on lessons, rehearsal, and solo practice, and the bright future I saw for myself with regards to what I can offer those I teach. Two weeks passed, and I had an hour in which to answer the question that is the basis for why I am even playing the instrument I love. And after two weeks of the brewing an answer in the back of my mind, I finally sat down and wrote the reason I go through all the trouble of going to these lessons, rehearsals, and hours of practice. Though I completed the assignment in about five minutes, I feel that it was all right there in my brain just waiting to come out. And here is my answer:

I play the violin in order that I might further the talent that God gave me. I study so that I might grow my talent as far as I possibly can. I teach so that I might pass on my love for music to those around me and to show that anyone can enjoy music at any age.

~Meghan Lyons

The Racial Divide: African-Americans vs. Caucasians

Building Friendships, Not Diversity

First, you must know my background—I lived in Cincinnati, Ohio until I went to college here in Memphis, I am Irish, German, and Scottish, and primarily Caucasian people live in my hometown.

We are all naturally biased towards what we know best and what we know best is normally what we feel most comfortable with. So, when we choose to speak in a certain manner, certain clothes or friends, we are doing so based off of what we know best. During my first visit to Memphis, I noticed that the African-Americans here had darker skin than most of those I had seen up north. And after the few days I spent here at The University of Memphis during freshman orientation, I noticed that most of the African-American people did not mix with the Caucasian people as much I had seen up north. This was very intriguing.

Throughout the school year that I have spent here at The University of Memphis, I have observed that those who do not act like most of the other people of their race are not usually welcomed by their own race. For example, if a Caucasian male dressed in an urban style, used slang in his speech, and had a heavy southern accent, he is not necessarily welcomed by the entirety of the Caucasian community because some consider his urban style to be only a trait of African-Americans. Therefore, some will not associate themselves with people like this guy, and use derogatory terms, such as “whigger,” when referring to him. As a result of the definite divide between African-Americans and Caucasians, there are less people who desire to date or marry the other race, thus there are less mixed people, meaning darker skin and lighter skin—no much in between.

The history of our country does not condone such behavior as ignoring or mistreating those who do not fit the mold we have created for those we like are to fit in. Therefore, we must break out of our molds and prototypes that feel comfortable and natural; learning to treat everyone with respect is the first step towards friendship.

RaNdOm QuOtEs

I find these quotes insightful. I love reading them over and over; they give me truths to ponder. Enjoy!

“Many things will catch your eye, but few with catch your heart. Pursue these.”

“True friendship comes when silence between two people is comfortable.
True love is not about finding the perfect person. It's about being that person.”

“Sometimes the people we meet change us forever.”

“You can't go through this life being afraid to love, because, without love, there just isn't any reason for living.”

“Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moment that will take your breath away.”

“To the world you may be one person but to one person you may be the world.”

“Don't be afraid of showing your feelings, be afraid of regretting it when you don't.”

“Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget.”

“Beauty unaware of itself is the most beautiful.”

“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you've forgotten the words.”

“Some people come into our lives and then leave very quickly. Some stay for a while and leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.”

If Only, If Only...

Below is a poem I wrote to my boyfriend, Matt, during a time when he did not understand how handsome I think he is. We do not see each other very often because we are going to colleges fourteen hours apart, so I felt that writing him a poem would aid in reiterating my feelings.


If only, if only you knew how much I was missing you
There would be no sad goodbyes with steady cries
Only dreams of when we will meet again

When I think of your face I think of the place
I find rest and hope of bright future, full of never-ending love

And when your strong steady hand holds mine
I feel as if I can rule the world with you by my side

Your loving arms keep me warm and secure
Through the storms of life they are the cure

But when you lips cradle my own
I feel that where you are is where I belong
I long for those soft sweet moments where your lips embrace and your heart will race

If only, if only you knew how much I was missing you
Everything you are, everything you do, everything I see when I look at you
I love it all...I won't lie

Last, but not least, I adore your eyes
For there lies the key to your heart
Through them I can see into your intermost part

I love you
That's it
One-hundred percent
Hurting you isn't what I meant

Only to show you
Despite all the handsome men I have seen
You are the most handsome! YOU, Matthew King, are my dream! <3

God is Calling The Prodigal: The Older Brother

The preacher where I attend did a three Sunday series of sermons on the parable that Jesus told about the Prodigal Son. I found the last sermon particularly powerful; it was on the older brother’s role and perspective in the story.

Text: Luke 15:11-32

1. The story of the Prodigal Son.
a. The younger brother asks for his inheritance and receives it.
b. He leaves, taking only one-third of the father’s assets, but a portion of the workforce as well.
c. The older brother stays behind and works hard to maintain the family’s property.
d. The older brother returns to a celebration of his brother’s return.
e. Notice the statements the older brother makes to his father:
i. I have been slaving for you.
ii. You didn’t give me anything.
iii. He devoured your property.
-The property was the younger brother’s to spend.
f. The older brother’s statement is slander.

2. Who does the older brother represent? The faithful Christian
-This story is really about the older brother.

3. We learn that…
a. God will treat us justly.
b. With privilege comes responsibility.
c. We need to have an attitude of service.
d. We should be forgiving.
e. We need to see our brother’s return as God sees it; it is a celebration!